| I felt all day like I was smothered by the absence of sophistication while drowning in the abundance of ignorance using an inflatable dartboard. |
Now don’t that just leave you all up in mustard trying to ketchup.
| Xanax, the miracle drug that was made solely for the purpose of riding shotgun when your fifteen year old daughter is driving. |
| Everyone that comes and goes in your life does so for a reason. Think twice before you chase after them to come in, or follow them when they leave. |
| Lesson for the day: kids only want to be loved, held, appreciated, and wanted. So if you don’t have time for your child, make it, or one day they won’t have time for you. |