| When I got married it was to Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was always. |
| Dealing with women is a lot like eating artichokes, you have to go through so much to get so little. |
| I’d rather you hate me for who I am than to love me for who I am not. I don’t want to be slicker than a greased pig turned politician, I want to be honest. |
Common sense is like a hot shower, the people who need it the most use it the least.
Some folks are as useless as an ashtray on a motorcycle