| If a cat lands feet first, and butter toast always falls butter side down, what happens when you glue buttered toast to a cat’s back and toss them off a roof? |
Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear and Chuck Norris wears Bobby Brantley underwear.
Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day unless you want to lure in crap eating dogs
Guys, if she tells you it’s ok, it’s not. If she tells you she understands, she doesn’t. If she tells you don’t worry, you better worry, GOT IT!
When facing life’s problems remember there’s more ways to choke a dog than by just feeding him peanut butter.