| Hard to have a battle of wits with someone half armed verbally. You’d rather go skinny dipping with snapping turtles than to fish this creek. |
| Meanness doesn’t just happen overnight, so never corner anything meaner than you, or you’ll end up looking like a dead pig in the sunshine. |
| We’re so far ahead of the curve that when Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he discovered two missed calls from Lizard Lick Towing. |
| When we learn from a loss it then becomes a gain. Some of the greatest lessons in this world are derived from pain and suffering. |
Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear and Chuck Norris wears Bobby Brantley underwear.