| The 2nd thing I learned today: No matter how big and tough you are, when a little girl asks you to play with dolls, grabbing a GI Joe doesn’t count, so you give in. |
| That moment when you realize the guy in line behind you’s momma should have dropped him on his head at birth and sold the milk. |
I met a guy that is so backwoods that he chapped his lips on the cows udder getting milk and he lost his tongue opening up a can of Copenhagen
The man that said the pen is mightier than the sword had obviously never been stabbed with one.
I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if it wasn’t filled with sponges.