| I’ll smack you so hard your tongue will wrap around your eye tooth and you won’t be able to see what you’re gonna say next. |
| When the boogey man goes to sleep every night he looks under the bed for Bobby Brantley. |
| Why grab the bull and get the horns when you can shoot the bull and get the steaks. Leaves you as confused as Mike Tyson at a spelling bee, doesn’t it? |
| That moment when you realize the guy in line behind you’s momma should have dropped him on his head at birth and sold the milk. |
Bravery allows you to fight the battles, but wisdom teaches you which battles you should not fight.