| If a cat lands feet first, and butter toast always falls butter side down, what happens when you glue buttered toast to a cat’s back and toss them off a roof? |
| When you hit stone barriers in the roads of life, remember the weak minded view them as obstacles, the strong willed view them as stepping stones. |
| When you’re having trouble looking in the mirror in the mornings, It’s usually because your life is broken, not the glass. Only you can change the reflection. |
One hundred percent of all divorces start with marriage.
| A lazy person will never buy an item with a handle, because that could mean work for them, and lazy folks are as useful as chicken crap on a doorknob. |