| The early bird gets the worm but the fat happy worm sleeps late. So today will you be the bird or the worm? |
| I once had a college essay on what’s courage and got an A when I turned in a blank paper with my name on top. That’s slicker than eel snot. |
| The only difference in a rut and a grave is the depth. So if you find yourself in a desperate situation hang in there like a hair in a biscuit to find the exit. |
| To the ones who feel alone, seem lost, think nobody cares, go to bed alone, cry with no shoulder, and the ones in the left field, I respect you, because I used to be you. |
| Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words “The” and “IRS” together it spells “Theirs.” |