U were born an original don’t die a copy. Your tougher than woodpecker lips dipped in cement. Yous slicker than a greased pig at a Mongolian bbq.
| Next time you complain of no shoes, forget the man with no feet. Think of the man with no legs, then come back and tell me how bad your problem is. |
| Today I made a huge mistake. In doing so I learned that I can’t control other’s lives and decisions, but I can scare the life out of their boyfriends. |
| When life gets tough just hang in there like a hair in a biscuit. Do the best you can do and let the rough end drag. That’s the Lick Life. |
| Life’s lesson #192: You can turn a housewife into a whore, but you can never turn a whore into a housewife. |