| Only think slicker than a greased pig turned politician is a harpooned in a banana tree dipped in butter. |
I think the only reason my mother in law wasn’t with Noah on the ark, is they couldn’t find another monster I mean animal that looked like her.
God is always there in the midst of chaos.
I met a guy that is so backwoods that he chapped his lips on the cows udder getting milk and he lost his tongue opening up a can of Copenhagen
| When you stir up the waters of life you’re going to find your swimming with sharks and they smell fear long before they smell blood. Be a victor not a victim. |