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Big Lizard Wisdom

God grant me serenity, patience & Rachel Ray as my wife’s new best friend cause if you can smell what’s cooking at the house, Amy burned dinner again.

Favorite Verses

If a man with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself would it be considered attempted murder or a hostage stiuation.

Dirt Word

If a cat lands feet first, and butter toast always falls butter side down, what happens when you glue buttered toast to a cat’s back and toss them off a roof?

Ronism

A man just told me, “everyday above ground is a good day” but I have to ponder, does an earthworm take to that point of view?

Ronosophy

If you are going to eat it don’t name it