If you can’t be everything to everybody just be something to someone.
| Bobby Brantley is so bad when the Hulk sees him he turns back into Bruce Banner. |
| Just remarried my best friend grinning like a possum in a persimmons tree and realized that I married up so far I need an elevator pass. |
There are two types of people, chess and checker’s players. Chess players won’t usually play checker’s but checker’s players become chess champions
| That awkward moment when you realize when your wife said she was hungry you were not supposed to say “me too, what are you cooking for dinner?” |
