| A lazy person will never buy an item with a handle, because that could mean work for them, and lazy folks are as useful as chicken crap on a doorknob. |
| You can drink to drown your problems but one day you shall realize that problems have learned how to swim. |
The real secret to life is learning how to keep your goats away from the trolls and the trolls away from your bridges.
| Only thing I have ever seen achieve success by sitting is a hen. So unless you can lay eggs you should be striving to achieve by doing, not waiting. |
| Xanax, the miracle drug that was made solely for the purpose of riding shotgun when your fifteen year old daughter is driving. |
