| When you see one roach, there’s always fifty more you can’t see. So keep the lights on when dealing with those lower than snake snot, it tends to blind them. |
| Hard to have a battle of wits with someone half armed verbally. You’d rather go skinny dipping with snapping turtles than to fish this creek. |
| It’s darkest before the dawn so if you’re going to roll your neighbor’s house that’s the time to do it. |
| Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Call them steps outside and stairs inside? Why does fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? |
| If you’re gonna cry over spilt milk, go out and buy your own cow. Do the work yourself and deal with the bull then you have the right to whine. |