30th ANNUAL LIZARD LICK FESTIVAL
| If you find a diamond in a goat’s butt you have to question your reason for being there. You must question the true value of the diamond. |
| If you want to impress me, don’t talk about yourself. Rather talk about the people that made you who you are. You were molded. Teach me about the potter. |
| If you’re gonna cry over spilt milk, go out and buy your own cow. Do the work yourself and deal with the bull then you have the right to whine. |
| Ever meet someone who proved as soon as they opened their mouth everything they learned came from watching Gilligan’s Island. |
Why do they put flotation devices under the seats of planes and not parachutes?