They say an eye for an eye leaves both parties blind but I say not if you are wearing sunglasses
| There’s a difference in watching a kid grow and raising a kid. If you don’t know the difference, you shouldn’t have kids. |
| Only thing to fear is fear itself was not said by a man married to a redhead who would put a rattlesnake in your pocket and then ask for a light. |
| When life gives you lemons, don’t fret. Cut them up and squeeze them into your buddies eyes, then you will learn to appreciate their power. |
| Tim Tebow can throw a football sixty yards on one knee. Amy Shirley is so strong she can throw Tim Tebow farther than that. |