| When life gives you lemons, cut em in half and squirt them in your buddies eyes and watch as they roll around like a harpooned hippo in a banana tree. |
| That awkward moment when you bark back at a dog to show him who the real boss is. |
| To see who you are, don’t look in a mirror. Look at your kids and your friends and your family, then look at your heart. These things reflect who you truly are. |
| In life, do the best you can do and let the rough end drag cause it’s better to eat briars through a picket fence than to eat nails on a silver spoon. |
I just saw a lady that had more wrinkles that a elephants ball sack. More rolls than a New York bakery. More chins than a Chinese phone book.