| It’s darkest before the dawn so if you’re going to roll your neighbor’s house that’s the time to do it. |
| Bobby facts: When God is shocked he says “oh my Bob”. He could survive Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun. He put the laughter in manslaughter. |
Never go skinny dipping with snapping turtles
| I would rather slide down a mountain of razor blades naked into a pool full of rubbing alcohol than argue with a redheaded woman. |
| Just because it purrs like a kitten, doesn’t mean it can’t bite like a dog. A bee will always fly faster than the tractor you are driving. |